The Week Before Christmas
by ElementofHeart
Summary: [Post-Series] [Slight!AU] "But I'm being honest when I say that you shouldn't blame yourself." His tone softened. "I'm here for you, Lapis. We're in this together, remember? We promised each other we'd look out for each other...and now that we're together-together, that shouldn't change."


**Everyone needs a little more Stapis/Lapiven in their lives. :) As always, this story features older!Steven, and is it many years after the Gems defeat Homeworld, and everything has sailed smoothly and peacefully.**

 **Until a small bump in the road occurs. Enjoy!**

* * *

"You don't have to talk if you don't want to."

She'd seen him coming from the moment she heard footsteps, and her suspicions were confirmed when his feet rested on the circle she conjured up using the ocean's water that that had been surrounding her for a moment before he sat beside her. She'd extended the circle without a word, including Steven in her 'territory'.

Steven didn't say anything after that for while, he just sat beside her, most likely watching the ocean as the waves threatened to creep closer, but always fell back before they could reach them—or maybe he was even looking at her, she couldn't tell.

She just hid her head in her knees and listened to the sound of the large body of water; her safehaven, one that she and Steven only knew about.

Lapis hadn't expected Steven to say anything for a while, but she had to admit, he had internally startled her when he began to create a familiar tune.

 _"It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas,"_ Steven hummed all of a sudden, _"Ev'rywhere you go..."_

It was almost Christmas, she remembered.

The one holiday that she'd fallen in love with all those years ago, where everything was bright and colorful and the humans—people, she corrected herself—followed through weird traditions like randomly sing at people's doors or send letters of what they wanted to some old, creepy man who came through your chimney and wait for him to give them their requested items.

But here she was, just a week before the holiday and she had already ruined it by having a flashback of her time as Malachite at the dinner table.

It had been so long since she had those traumatic recurrences...she thought those days were over. Unfortunately, today proved that she had been horribly wrong.

She ran before anybody could say anything; but she had seen the looks of worry and horror from the rest of the Gems when she finally recovered, and the dinner...she had unknowingly destroyed the table and all the food Connie and the Gems had so delicately prepared, too deep into her nightmare that she wasn't able to control herself.

But Lapis blamed herself anyways. Steven, on the other hand, seemed relatively calm; acting as if nothing had happened.

She didn't like it. At all.

But she didn't say it out loud.

Steven seemed to have read her mind, because he suddenly voiced, "It's not your fault, Lapis."

 _But it is._ She wanted to say. _I couldn't control myself and freaked out. I ruined everything._

He shuffled beside her, fighting against the urge to pull her towards him. But he knew that Lapis was sensitive when she was upset, and he didn't want to make it worse for her. Dark eyes focusing on her visage, he continued quietly, "We all have moments like that when we can't control ourselves. The war with Homeworld isn't something that's easy to get over, you know."

 _That doesn't excuse me from destroying our table and everyone's food._

Steven sighed, seeing as Lapis had yet to utter word. But he didn't push her to say anything; he knew her like the back of his hand, and knew she would talk when she was ready, that he respected.

"You know," Steven said after a moment of silence, "it's not like you guys eat food anyway; well, except for Amethyst. But I think I would've bloated a lot more if I had to stuff all that dinner so that the food won't go to waste. Imagine that: I'd be like a beach ball by now—and I hear that's not a very good image for someone who's supposed to be one of the saviours of the world." He laughed lightly, eyes flickering to the gem beside him for a reaction.

He was only met with stillness yet again. And it discouraged significantly more than he wanted to admit, a frown making it's way to his face as his fists clenched at his sides.

He was more than sure that he had just completely failed as a friend, an ally, and...a boyfriend.

But then, for a moment, Steven swore he heard the sound of stifled laughs coming from his partner. Instantly, his mood boostened, knowing that his honest, heartfelt words were not said in vain.

He decided it was best to end it while she was still responsive, saying, "But I'm being honest when I say that you shouldn't blame yourself." His tone softened. "I'm here for you, Lapis. We're in this together, remember? We promised each other we'd look out for each other...and now that we're together-together, that shouldn't change."

Her head still remained tucked into knees, but at least one arm loosened from their grip around her legs and slowly rested itself beside him. Steven watched with a weak smile as her fingers drummed quietly into the sand, as if she were internally debating about something.

But nonetheless, he placed his hand beside hers, giving her an offer if she was willing to take it.

And after a few more moments, she did; she slowly reached for his hand, blue fingers interlocking with his peach ones as she gave it giving it a gentle, yet firm squeeze. The tears began to slowly fall, but she didn't utter single noise.

 _"Thank you."_

* * *

 **Merry Christmas to all you guys! Hope you guys have a nice break!**


End file.
